He is not here. He will no longer visit or live near me again. He will never see Clover grow up or go to the gardens with us again. There will be no more dinners at Temari or bike rides along the bay. No more sunsets or frozen yogurt or anime. He will never finish his PhD and become Dr. Bennett. He will never paint or read a great book. He will never sip chai or enjoy great conversation. We will never go to Santa Cruz. He will never be my housemate. I can never hug him or tell him how amazing he is because now he is gone and I did not even get to say goodbye.